I think the first step towards changing any behavior is admitting that you have a problem in the first place. So okay, here I go. I have a problem. Okay, I have many problems, including addiction to diet soda and a need to watch certain TV programs, but theses are problems that, although I will admit to them, I don't really want to change them. However, I do have one problem that I love to death, but I need to change it for the welfare of my family and to just plain feel less guilty about it. So here it is in plain English. I love to sleep. Way too much. I think about sleeping all day long. When I first wake up in the morning, the first thing that I think about is how long I have to wait until the kids nap time (so I can nap too). When I get up from said nap, I count the hours until I hope to be in bed (usually unnaturally early - I shoot for a 9 pm bed time, but that doesn't happen often). And when I don't get to bed at an early hour, I tend to be grumpy and/or lazy that night. On nights that I know I have to get things done (i.e. laundry night) or nights when I know I will be out late (i.e. canning nights or date night) I have to mentally prepare myself to stay awake. And when I go to bed at night I dread the 7 am hour when I have to be up. And on weekends I always think of excuses, any will do, to convince Bryan that I need to sleep in. Aaahhhh....sleep....how I love you! But here is my problem. Although I looooove to sleep, I feel immensely guilty that I am wasting precious time that I could be spending with my family. If I got up early I could fix a nice breakfast for my kids instead of hustling them out the door with an Eggo waffle and a sippy of milk. I could shower and be ready to go when they get up so I could help them get ready and spend time with them instead of sticking them in front of Playhouse Disney while I shower and dress. If I didn't nap I could help Rix with homework, play games with him, and on days Bryce doesn't nap I could teach him letters and I could play with him. If I stayed up later than my beloved 9 pm I could spend quality time with Bryan. I could pick up my house without three boys running underfoot, I could finish all my half-finished projects. I could work on writing my book, start a new embroidery project, or organize my messy bedroom. Now I understand that sleep is important to our health, but I'm getting like 11 or so hours of day of sleep. So not needed for a 29 year-old healthy woman! I think I get more sleep than Rix! So I'm taking the first step. I am admitting that I'm a sleep junkie, and I need some serious help. What do you do to keep energetic? What do you do to find motivation to conquer tasks and projects? What to you do to keep your patience in the middle of a heated Disney Sorry game when all you really want to do is take a nap? Share your wisdom with me. And just do you know, I will still probably nap every once in a while. I will probably sleep in on occasion. And I will still probably go to bed early once in a while. But I need to make my family and my home a priority and, well, right now, I think sleep is taking that place. And FYI - I am writing this post during nap time, so yeah for me! I'm not currently sleeping (although I am thinking about it...)
Friday, November 6, 2009
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7 comments:
I read your blog and at first thought that you were being "tongue in cheek"...but now I am thinking that you are serious. The first thing that I would suggest is....go to the doctor and have him/her do a complete blood chemistry on you. Have a chem 24 including your Fe ( iron levels) and your TSH ( thyroid). It may not be your "fault". What about your monthly cycle? I know that it is none of my business...but these are the first things that need to be asked. If it turns out to not be anything physical, then here is what I do to stay on top of my game ( most of the time anyway). I am an avid list maker. I make a list and stick to it. Although with all the 9 daycare children in an out, there are times when I can only work on something for a few minutes at a time. Please know that having three, healthy and busy boys will make anyone tired. It is hard on a body to be pregnant often and in close succession. I am not preaching to you, of course, but just stating that pregnancies are hard work on a body. This is just my two cents worth. Please make an appointment with your doctor and get a complete physical. You won't regret it.
I LOVE sleep too and get really grouchy if I don't get to sleep in at least once a week or nap! During nap time, though, I always do something first, like exercise for 30-45 minutes, help with Olivia's homework, play a game with her, do laundry, etc, and then, if there is still time to lay down, I will. And I don't feel guilty about it because sometimes the kids need time to themselves too. They need downtime as much as you do and I don't think you laying down for a little bit is a crime. Every day is a little much, but not days you didn't sleep well at night or aren't feeling well then go for it! Also, wake up and go to sleep at the same time every day (except occasionaly when you sleep in a little) and exercise! When I was exercising in Ohio every day, I had a ton of energy to get things done and wasn't near as tired as I am now. Just know that when you want to nap and you are sooo tired, find something to do like read a book with a Diet Coke (treat yourself!) or watch a DVR'd show while Rix does something else (I don't let Olivia watch TV during quiet time).
And I agree, if nothing seems to help, talk to the dr. You could have sleep apnea or something that is making you tired no matter how much sleep you get!
Man, sleep-addiction must be a Hjelm thing. I'm so used to walking around in a half-daze most of the time because I didn't get a nap and/or sleep in. But here's what I've learned. One, make sure you drink at least half your weight in ounces of water (if you're 120, you drink 60 oz water). Two, exercise daily, but not before bedtime. Three, eat mini meals throughout the day, don't go more than 3 hours without something to eat, make them 200-300 calories. Four, eat protien, including nuts, for a snack if you need an energy boost. And I like the idea of seeing a dr, if anything just to rule things out. Now I just need to follow my own advice :)
So, my theory is this: regardless of what you do, now that you are an adult and a mom, you are always going to be tired. If you get up early, if you go to bed late, if you get a nap or not. You will be tired. And, I think part of life is learning how to conquer or cope with it.
I'm guilty too--I go in and out of napping phases. When I'm in a napping phase it's terrible. It does take away from the kids. I do think about it a lot. And, I don't feel any better when I wake up. It's the worst when we need to sit and read and I can't stay awake. I hate trying to jump up and do something to wake myself up.
Maybe try to make that key tired time a reward time. You get to watch your favorite show, or get a special snack (cupcakes?).
Good luck. And, congrats on accomplishing your first step!!
Wanna break? Come over next week and I'll make lunch and you can relax while the kids play! Wednesday? No school to worry about...If you get this before dinner on sunday (tomorrow) call me and you are now officially invited to dinner too!
When I was pregnant with Hannah I felt like if I wasnt sleeping I was laying down or wishing I could. I worried that after she was born I would be miserable. At first I was sleep deprived but she started sleeping through the night and Ive noticed I feel better now with a small baby than I have ever, so I started thinking about why it is that I feel so much better and Ive figured it out. Hayleighs bus stop is 1/2 a mile away and we walk there so I walk a mile there and back before and after school everyday and I honestly think this is the reason I feel good. Once School started and we started walking daily is around the time Hannah started sleeping well and I think my daily walk is the cause because this week while Brian has been home Ive had him get her a few times and Ive been really sleepy and unmotivated. I dont eat breakfast most mornings. I go through spurts where the food Brian wants to eat will sound good (Freezer Pizzas, French Fries, Hot Dogs you know basic crap food) and when were in one of those Brians favorite food binge sessions I feel pretty crappy too. In my opinion though you probably are pretty active with the boys and the excersise isnt the issue but most likely low iron or something to that effect
Can't blame you for loving sleep.
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